The Internet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was:

> Oh Oracle most wise, who has all of the crackz, codez and warez, please
> tell me...
>
> I've won every computer game I know of, and people keep telling me I
> should try something called "Real Life." They say it has great 3D and
> real-time interaction with the characters. Tell me, oh brilliant
> Oracle, where can I get a copy of "Real Life?" And are there any cheat
> codes?

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} Ah, supplicant. Rumors of an interactive "Real Life" are not without
} a basis in fact.
}
} In fact, you've probably seen others playing this game when you
} ventured out of your dingy abode for food or warez. Those were not
} avatars wandering the malls and pizza joints. With the exception of
} the characters in Starbucks, many of the "people" you've seen actually
} *have* a life. A Real Life.
}
} Unfortunately, there is no "winning" in Real Life. You may fall prey
} to Yet Another Stupid Death (and will likely encounter many Funny
} Messages), but only two people have reportedly ascended to demigodhood,
} and (as it turns out) neither actually *had* the amulet.
}
} Everyone else dies. Even you. And it's permanent. No exceptions
} (except me).
}
} Some say it's possible to win before dying -- you may have heard "He
} Who Dies With the Most Toys Wins." This is a fallacy ... toys or no,
} everyone still dies. And there's no "save" feature (although some
} people will tell you they've been saved), much less a restore function.
}
} There's no need for cheat codes in Real Life. Each player gets to
} make up the rules as they play. Some people agree to play by an
} ever-shifting, highly variable set of "general rules" (some people
} call them 'Commandments'), but no player is truly bound by any
} rules whatsoever. As in the games you've played, some actions have
} adverse consequences, but even those can be avoided by skillful or
} lucky players. Or those with good lawyers (Right, O.J.?)
}
} Real Life can be as addicting as Nethack, as gory as Doom,
} as graphically rich as Riven. It can also be as exciting as Pong.
} You may already have a demo version of Real Life. Turn off your
} computer and find out.
}
} Odds are, you'll return to your warez soon anyway.
}
} You owe the Oracle the source code to Real Life.